Rocking His FAKE World

I feel it in my bones, in the pit of my stomach.

I feel it every time she opens her mouth to sing and every time she smiles.

I feel it every time we touch, with every beat of my heart and every breath I take.

I know everyone is right, but I don’t care.

I know I’m going to be more broken in the end than I’ve ever been before, but that won't stop me.

I knew the moment I pretended to be her fake boyfriend.

The moment I lied to myself that I wasn’t falling in love with her.

The moment we both agreed that whatever this thing was between was over when she went on tour.

I stand in the parking lot in the middle of the night, watching her tour bus drive out of sight and I’m suddenly reminded of something I’ll never get.

I’ll never have what my friends have, spending every day together for the rest of their lives.

I’ll never get to have a family with the woman I love.

I’ll never be the proud father who’s passing out pink bubble gum cigars.

The night around me is quiet, cold, windy, and wet.

Suddenly, I’ve never felt more alone.

Would I take back all those days I spent with her? Would I take back all those stolen kisses? All those nights spent dreaming of just one more night?

Even if it could take away a little bit of this pain?

Not for an instant.

I’d do it all over again... because she’s worth the heartbreak.

Now, with only the memory of her kisses to hold on to, I realize how wrong I was.